"Black Arts" Index Maintenance - GUIDs v.s. Fragmentation - Jeff Moden - YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfQtY17bPQ4

Something like this?

DECLARE 
 @input INT = 15697
,@convert VARCHAR(100)
,@position INT = 1
,@result VARCHAR(100)
,@output INT
,@length INT

SELECT @convert = CONVERT(VARCHAR(100),@input)
SELECT @length = LEN(@convert)

WHILE @position <= @length
BEGIN
SELECT @result = ISNULL(@result,'')...

No issues going straight to SP4.

Install the latest SP (sp4) then the latest security fix to ensure your at build 11.0.7507.

Plan your upgrade though, you have less than 9 months...

Create your trigger as you normally would do but add the additional columns_updated() function to specify when it should fire for what columns you want to to update for the...

You can do a read scale AOAG without the need for a cluster.  You get no HADR features but if it’s just for reporting read scale is ample and you...

Really need to upgrade.

SQL2000 and Access 2000 really using 21+ year old technology in this day and age your asking for issues.

Your going to have to look at the queries...

Restore from backup is your only hope.

Zero day exploits you referring to?

For that I would look at ZeroDayLab / CyberClan etc to see what’s been reported.

Never seen Microsoft acknowledge a CVE until after they have issued...

SSRS patching has changed since 2017 and it being a separate installer.

The below is the official doc on when fixes are released etc

https://docs.microsoft.com/en-us/sql/reporting-services/release-notes-reporting-services?view=sql-server-ver15#sql-server-2019-reporting-services

However there is no separate exe for the...

If that works for you great.

If not look at coalesce instead of isnull or some other construct.

You know your own data better than anyone here so you will need to...

Instead of writing my own powershell I’d use dbatools and look at Get-DbaDbTable to replace your code then pipe that to convert-dbadatatable and then write-dbadatatable

The only way what you describe working is if you had multiple tenants and they each had their own database.

Say you had a client in New York, you would put...

No that’s not how it works.

The same application which is split 50/50 between DCS needs to access 1 read write copy of the database and potentially multiple read only copies.

So...

Adhoc statements will be null

Object_Name function only works in the correct database context if you supply object_id only.

You need to pass it the database id also to get the right...

Remove all the ISNULL with some other construct.

ISNULL is not SARGable and will cause RBAR which is what your seeing.