You just might be a DBA if.....

  • You hesitate to give your husband datawriter permissions on the family planner.

  • Or for that fact your spouse direct access to the family budget, they mut go thru you and you only return the stuff you want them to know.

    "Don't roll your eyes at me. I will tape them in place." (Teacher on Boston Public)

  • You stop the Visual Basic programmers from creating stored procs under dbo because it's less grief to manually check every one first than to implicitly trust their idea of well written SQL.

    Jon Reade


  • get *really* worked up about the indents in Query Analyser not displaying properly when you double click on a stored proc in Enterprise Manager.

    Jon Reade


  • have to tell recruitment agents "No, MICROSOFT Sql Server, not SYBASE"...

    Jon Reade


  • ... you wish Bank of America would let you download your (personal) statements in XML.


  • you might be a dba if you..

    ... handle problematic users by putting a trigger on sysprocesses, killing any connection that user tries to make


  • You are defeinitely a DBA if...

    you read these and laugh. 🙂

  • At the end of prayer , you say COMMIT instead of Amen!


  • OR

    you are the only one in your office who knows that the data aware applications that are used in the office ( coded in C or some other letter ) are not the database and hence not your responsibility

    Not even you shadow is to be trusted ..... words of : SHADOWTRAITOR

    Not even you shadow is to be trusted ..... words of : SHADOWTRAITOR

  • You just might be a DBA if...

    you users are complaining about response time and you tell them the database needs to be reorged... and they have no idea what you are talking about.

  • ...When the mention of Excel causes the veins in your head to start bulging and you run for the nearest exit.

    **Everyone knows Excel is the Devil

  • If you start finding ways (or think your finding ways) to block less experienced people with sa priveleges from performing tasks just to see if you can stump them.

    Robert Marda

    Robert W. Marda
    Billing and OSS Specialist - SQL Programmer
    MCL Systems

  • You just might be a DBA if......

    The thought of cleaning tables has nothing to do with food

    "Keep Your Stick On the Ice" ..Red Green

  • You open the transaction log when something is missing from your desk at office...

Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 61 total)

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