The Coping Thread

  • That's a tough place to be.

    I feel that a bit as I'm one of the much older people at Redgate, who are often in their 20s. I do try to stoke some conversations, and understand what is important to the younger ones, but the chats tend to be short.

    Hope you find a way to engage with some others.

  • On a side note: I see there is some relation between Red Gate and SQL SERVER CENTRAL but I'm just not connecting the dots. Can you explain what the correlation is? (briefly)

    Also, I see a "Write for us" section. Is there a recommended path to take or is it simply an act of submitting an article?

    Thanks.

    Aubrey W Love
    aka: PailWriter
    https://www.aubreywlove.com/

  • Redgate owns SQLServerCentral. They purchased the site about 13-14 years ago. I now work for Redgate, though they give me a lot of independent editorial control.

    Just submit an article and we'll get you feedback. Usually takes about a week.

  • Thanks. I'll put together an article and submit it to see how things tic along.

    I read the contributor pages, seems fairly straight forward.

     

    Aubrey W Love
    aka: PailWriter
    https://www.aubreywlove.com/

  • Aubrey Love wrote:

    Jeff,

    I just love that quote. "Dear Lord... I'm a DBA so please give me patience because, if you give me strength, I'm going to need bail money too!"  

    It took me a while, but I finally got back in my chair (having fallen out laughing so hard) to send you this reply and say thank you for making my day.

    (Still laughing and my co-workers are wondering what's up.) Let 'em wonder.

    I'm sorry... I totally missed your reply.  I have to admit, I laughed at you laughing about it.  Now it's you that have made mine.  I'm going to have to put that quote back into my signature line.  Glad to "meet" you.

    Heh... almost forgot... "Seatbelts save lives" (at least people laughing so hard) 😀

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • Heh... almost forgot... "Seatbelts save lives" (at least people laughing so hard)

     

    Alas, my office chair is not equipped with a seat belt, just a couple of retainer rails, but I mostly use them as arm rests.

    Nice to "virtually meet" you as well.

    Aubrey W Love
    aka: PailWriter
    https://www.aubreywlove.com/

  • Aubrey Love wrote:

    Jeff,

    I just love that quote. "Dear Lord... I'm a DBA so please give me patience because, if you give me strength, I'm going to need bail money too!"  

    It took me a while, but I finally got back in my chair (having fallen out laughing so hard) to send you this reply and say thank you for making my day.

    (Still laughing and my co-workers are wondering what's up.) Let 'em wonder.

    looool!!

    -------------------
    A SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. He walks up to them and asks, "Can I join you?"
    Ref.: http://tkyte.blogspot.com/2009/02/sql-joke.html

  • We were informed a little while ago that we will probably be working from home until at least 31st March 2021 so I have started planning for the long haul over the winter now.

    Offices are being refitted to enable social distancing and our more customer facing  staff will be using them and given the number of people we have a seriously doubt we will have the physical room for us all to be in the offices again for the foreseeable future.

    On the upside I find I have more time to exercise so rather than putting weight on I have actually lost it, I have also finally succeeded in baking a really nice sourdough loaf and am looking at doing bagels next.

    My team had all previously worked from home at various points in the week so they are pretty cool with it as well and we have a regular coffee break Teams or Skype meeting to chat in general.

    As for the weather - summer here has been pretty fickle - we were lucky in the early lockdown as the weather was warm and sunny but July and August were quite frankly crap and September has not started any better.

     

     

     

  • Today's tip: Look at photos from a time with happy memories

    My screensaver is a slideshow of favourite personal photos of places we've been and ranges from Malmo to Barcelona, Mizen Head to Prague. On the laptop in the office it generates interest when I walk away from my desk and at home on the big pc screen, I often find hubby just happily sitting watching the show and reliving the moment.

  • I have a folder under "Pictures" that syncs across devices. I use that for the same reason.

    On my desktop, I've started to use the multiple desktop background feature and pick 3 photos + the month's coping calendar. I think change the pix every month when a new calendar comes out.

  • It took awhile but I'm really struggling now. I'm in the US and it feels really bad. 200,000 plus dead from COVID-19. Our leadership is lacking at the national and state level. I'm feeling fatigued, have trouble sleeping, high anxiety. I'm a member of a minority group targeted for hate by our president and others.

  • I am right there with you. My day to day life is great, but I'm struggling a bit with the weight of the world. I live in a very conservative area, and while people in general are pleasant, I am a little wary every time I go to town. I've taken to avoiding things in my county most of the time and driving to the next one over, which isn't further, but is a little less disconcerting.

    Hopefully some of my coping tips are helping. They certainly help me to work through them on a regular basis.

  • I've been through several loved ones passing on, and dealing with health issues caused by medication that cured one health problem. In short, definitely among the most challenging years of my life. How do i cope?

    1 Take walks whenever i can - only exception is when it is raining. Am lucky to live in a state with lots of sun even in winter (NC) so that makes it easier. Walking helps me focus on things outside my body  and mind. Watching nature - dried trees, odd bird or two that is still around, weird vegetation that braves the cold to stay..all of these keep my soul nourished.

    2 Watch funny movies...laughter helps the soul and mind. Watched 'Junior', then 'Coming to America'..onwards now to several others. I typically do this while eating my lunch or dinner.

    3 Do tapping meditation, several times daily - https://www.thetappingsolution.com/blog/stress-anxiety-tap-along/ - I highly recommend this even for those who are not into meditation..It is non religious, easy, pragmatic way to release stress.

    4 Listen to podcasts that offer a down to earth, pragmatic and science based view of what future holds - my favorite is 'In the Bubble' with Andy Slavitt.

    5 Talk to friends and family - mostly via chat as i do better with that compared to phone conversation. I am grateful to many friends in #sqlfamily who have offered some incredible tips during this difficult time.

    Hugs and best wishes to all, we will get through this.

    Mala

     

  • I've been meaning to add to this topic for a long time and finally decided that today is that time.

    Anyway, I started an effort more than a year ago (I'm almost at 400 days now) to post something each day to hopefully brighten someone else’s day (https://www.instagram.com/billgrogg/). And while I don’t get much response in the way of comments on the individual posts, I’ve had a number of people verbally tell me how much they look forward to these daily posts when I’ve seen them via video conference. And that’s been from people who don’t even take the step of “liking” the post.

    One thing that’s surprised me is how a particular post that I didn’t personally view as significant may strike a chord in someone else. As an example, after days of being inundated by thick smoke from the devastating forest fires last September here in Oregon, I had sprayed the ash off a rose and photographed the now-clean flower with clinging water droplets. That became my post for the day along with a little paragraph about resilience. Someone responded (to the mirrored post on Facebook) “Thank you for that reminder, needed it today” and someone else with “Best one yet!”

    Just knowing that someone finds benefit in them gives me the motivation to continue. But I’ve also noticed that taking the time to select a photo or video and write something about it has affected my own attitude. Despite continued challenges in so many ways, I think my overall outlook remains quite a bit more positive than it would likely be without this daily gratitude activity.

    Some days I’m more inspired (or rested or less time-constrained) than others and I may write a number of paragraphs. Other times I may only write a couple of sentences describing my photo or video choice.

    The Good News Newsletter from The Telegraph in the UK highlighted this effort twice in the last year for their readers and I hope these can be of benefit to the #SQLFamily as well.

    Take care and be well, everyone.

  • Nice, Bill. Some great pictures in there of nature. I'm going to be following.

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