I agree... I hate the "blame game". That's why I get pissed off when people, who frequently don't know much about databases, blame the DBA for being a supposed bottle-neck even when the DBA is actually (usually) right about the impact something is going to have on the databases and all things that use it. We ARE all in the same boat and we all should be working towards the success of the company. When people finally realize that one person's perception of what "bottle-neck" is is actually someone being a good and proper "gate-keeper" and they finally make the same effort to cooperate for the sake of the company, then we'll be on to something.
I can actually say that because I've worked on teams where the DBAs were considered to be ugly trolls hiding under the bridge just waiting to prevent all passage and (like the current team I have the extreme pleasure of working on) teams where the DBA(s), the Developers, AND THE MANAGERS have a real live appreciation for what each other do and are hell bent on improving things for the company in all ways.
If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right.