Cursors Without Performance Penalties

Question

Cursors Without Performance Penalties

Steve Jones - SSC Editor

SSC Guru

Points: 734434
More actions
April 1, 2020 at 12:00 am

#3738124

Comments posted to this topic are about the item Cursors Without Performance Penalties

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 19 total)

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Login to reply

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1003861 More actions · Answer 1

Whew!!! Nice one, Steve!! You had me going there! I was thinking that I should plan on retiring sooner than I really wanted because even the cursors in Oracle are still slower than good, solid, set-based code.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Steve Jones - SSC Editor SSC Guru Points: 734434 More actions · Answer 2

Steve Jones - SSC Editor

SSC Guru

Points: 734434

April 1, 2020 at 2:11 am

#3739496

🙂

Jo Pattyn SSC-Dedicated Points: 32068 More actions · Answer 3

Jo Pattyn

SSC-Dedicated

Points: 32068

April 1, 2020 at 7:24 am

#3739523

You got me. Nice one

David.Poole SSC Guru Points: 75896 More actions · Answer 4

Don't get too comfortable Jeff. SQL Server on Linux was also a Steve Jones classic April Fool

LinkedIn Profile

peter.row SSCarpal Tunnel Points: 4319 More actions · Answer 5

David.Poole wrote:

Don't get too comfortable Jeff. SQL Server on Linux was also a Steve Jones classic April Fool

?? I just logged into post the same thing on this.

[UPDATE] Seems SQL Server Central doesn't support unicode, a smiley face emoji comes out as ??

This reply was modified 4 years ago by peter.row. Reason: No unicode support

Brent Ozar SSCrazy Points: 2451 More actions · Answer 6

HAHAHA, you totally got me. I clicked the link. (sigh)

schleep SSChampion Points: 12582 More actions · Answer 7

Good one!!! You had me right up until "we'll start to see lots of new refactored code " BWAAA HAHAHA!!!

Doctor Who 2 SSCrazy Eights Points: 8177 More actions · Answer 8

Doctor Who 2

SSCrazy Eights

Points: 8177

April 1, 2020 at 12:26 pm

#3739594

Man, Steve, you got me. HAHAHA! I loved it.

Rod

latkinson SSCommitted Points: 1589 More actions · Answer 9

Good one. But sometimes I wish there was a better row by row method available for those few times when there appears to be no other option.

Luther

Eric M Russell SSC Guru Points: 125521 More actions · Answer 10

Any candidate who fails to get the joke doesn't get a 2nd interview. 🙂

"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Instead, seek what they sought." - Matsuo Basho

Ralph Hightower SSCrazy Points: 2843 More actions · Answer 11

Ralph Hightower

SSCrazy

Points: 2843

April 1, 2020 at 2:05 pm

#3739632

I had forgotten what day it is.

Steve Jones - SSC Editor SSC Guru Points: 734434 More actions · Answer 12

Glad you enjoyed it. Trying to come up with something to "get" you is always a fun challenge.

jarick 15608 Ten Centuries Points: 1253 More actions · Answer 13

You got me too but it would be a good idea to make it act more like PL/SQL I see a few Oracle applications are migrating to MS SQL and it would make things easier.

Mr. Brian Gale SSC-Insane Points: 24689 More actions · Answer 14

The link in the whitepaper seems to be broken :(.

This reply was modified 4 years ago by Mr. Brian Gale. Reason: fixing mistake (article vs whitepaper)

The above is all just my opinion on what you should do.
As with all advice you find on a random internet forum - you shouldn't blindly follow it. Always test on a test server to see if there is negative side effects before making changes to live!
I recommend you NEVER run "random code" you found online on any system you care about UNLESS you understand and can verify the code OR you don't care if the code trashes your system.