zielschmerz – n. the dread of pursuing a lifelong dream, which requires you to put your true abilities out there to be tested on the open savannah, no longer protected inside the terrerium of hopes and delusions that you started up in kindergarten and kept selaed as long as you could.
I don’t know I have any lifelong dreams, much less zielschmerz. I used to want to play professional sports, but that lifelong dream died a long time ago when I realized pursuing it wasn’t realistic.
I have enjoyed life and worked to grow my career, skills, and enjoyment in different ways. However, I am more a take things are they come and constantly re-evaluate what I want and need more than having a dream.
However, you can pursue a lifelong dream, which might not include being tested on the savannahs, but it might be tested in the real world. My wife changed careers to work with horses, taking a leap that she could actually earn enough to have that be a viable career. It’s been nearly 12 years now and she’s made it a success, though I know she had a lot of trepidation and anxiety in making the leap and growing her business.
Hopefully there is no more zielschmerz these days for her.
From the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows