redesis – n. a feeling of queasiness while offering someone advice, knowing they might well face a totally different set of constraints and capabilities, any of which might propel them to a wildly different outcome – which makes you wonder if all of your hard-earned wisdom is fundamentally nontransferable, like handing someone a gift card in your name that probably expired years ago.
These days, as I speak with others as a coach or just community peer, I feel some redesis about any sort of advice I give that isn’t tightly bound in some way to a situation. Any sort of general advice has me wondering if the things that worked for me will work for others.
I recognize that the way each of us see the world varies, depending on your situation. I think EVs are great and convenient, but I’m in a position where I can afford one and afford a charging station in my house. I don’t worry about the price of eggs or bacon, but that’s because I’m lucky. I don’t worry about health insurance because I’m healthy now.
The advice I give people about their careers is always tempered to remember my redesis. The things that worked for me might not work for others, so I’m careful to explain the situations where this worked for me rather than give the advice without context.
From the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows