I can relate. I was in a situation where I felt that if I did better, it was resented. But if I slacked off, I resented myself. I left the job, then came back, had lots of ups and downs, but stuck with it while I finished a degree and paid off our house.

Now, 7 years later and looking back, I realize that I took work way too seriously. People will do what they want to do, and management listens with one ear to the technical advice and the other ear to the politics. That's reality. Probably better in some environments than others. But, for me, the answer has been to keep coming in every day, decide for myself what I was willing to do, and collect my paycheck. My reward has been the respect and praise of the business people I work with. Now, after a few years of this, I'm finally retiring (at 30) to pursue other hobbies and interests.

The motto? Decide who you want to be and where you want to go long term. Then, determine if your work fits into that plan. If it does, then stick with it. If not, then make changes to align your life with your values. I know it's easier said than done, but it is doable.

Best of luck to you. Hope things are going well now.

Ron