Ahhhhh! I got it! Sort of...well, okay, it is a work-around anyway.

Imports System

Imports System.Data

Imports System.Data.SqlClient

Imports System.Data.SqlTypes

Imports Microsoft.SqlServer.Server

Imports Microsoft.VisualBasic.Strings

Partial Public Class UserDefinedFunctions

<Microsoft.SqlServer.Server.SqlFunction()> _

Public Shared Function...

I thought you had it until I tried to add it to a function. Then I get the error 'Invalid use of a side-effection operator 'INSERT EXEC' within a...

Thank you, but that did not help. I still get 3.00 as the result.

As for your question of turning SQL Server into a calculator: the application...