I don't quite see a question either.

BTW, having a covering index is not inherently a bad thing. Actually, it's inherently a good thing. But because of the cost of maintaining...

It was that lack of scale that forced me to go in and make edits to the code. It wouldn't compile as it was.

Yeah, that was the one I meant when I said "MUD" but it's supposed to be "MUCK."

Weeks, dude, weeks. I just keep telling myself that bringing the sword to work won't really help the problem... I think. Maybe it will...

You're telling me I fixed it by accident? I just put the semi-colon on because I've gotten in the habit of closing commands with it.

Yes, but starting with SQL Server 2005, the actual tables were hidden and all access to them was controlled through dynamic management views. Some of the views look exactly like...

A little overly complex, but very slick. Nicely done. A+. Please take my seat... no really... take my job, or just shoot me.

BTW, 2005 or better syntax is preferred.

Absolutely. Even down to the schema, although we were lazy and just left the enums in the 'dbo' schema, but yes. That's the way to go. You're maintaining a bit...

Again, I'm answering this with little to no information, so please take anything here as mild suggestions, not major pronouncements...

What about a design something like this:

Table: Item

Columns: ItemId

Size

Color

Description

Cost

?

Table: Order

Columns: OrderId

Company

OrderDate

DownPayment

?

Table:...

It depends on the UDF, but frequently they have no statistics on them, so the optimizer assumes one row. Since, in this case, it really will be one row, I...

One other thought, this sort of thing usually derives from something the business thinks it's not getting, so it wants to put a more business focused person in place. You...

Oh, then yes, the data describing the databases is stored in a series of views called dynamic management views. So that's yes to all three.

If I understand the question, why don't you just maintain this data in a table? Even if it's only one or two rows, you can join against it when you...

1 & 2, definately.

I'm not sure I understand what #3 is.

Be very, very nice about it, but get it down in writing that you're suggesting this might be a poor decision. Then, as long as you're getting paid... train away....