March 19, 2008 at 11:28 am
Hey, I lead a pack of Cub Scouts. I'm responsible for teaching them the "Fart Song."
[to the tune "The Yellow Rose of Texas"]
Oh, my body has a passage that leads up to my heart...
:w00t:
"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
- Theodore Roosevelt
Author of:
SQL Server Execution Plans
SQL Server Query Performance Tuning
March 19, 2008 at 11:30 am
Brandie Tarvin (3/19/2008)[hr
Oooohhh. Idea!!! :exclamationmark: Let's build our own maturity test. We've already got some of the basics in this very thread (RPG / Exotic Foods / Etc.)... We can start from there. @=)
How would you rate someone who spends every night hunched over their computer playing RPG's while chowing down on raw gooeyduck? :hehe:
For fast, accurate and documented assistance in answering your questions, please read this article.
Understanding and using APPLY, (I) and (II) Paul White
Hidden RBAR: Triangular Joins / The "Numbers" or "Tally" Table: What it is and how it replaces a loop Jeff Moden
March 19, 2008 at 11:33 am
Grant Fritchey (3/19/2008)
Whoa! Hold on. Revelation! People who come out of college are mature adults? Hmmm... To ask this in the proper SSC manner, you have a test that proves that?
One can hope get I? Actually, I had a Philosophy Professor you called the 18 to 25 year old clueless relativists. (Might not be the exact term, but he was obviously NOT a relativist.)
😎
March 19, 2008 at 11:45 am
hehe...I see Romper room is in session again....:)
I'd comment, but there are so many topics going....I think I'll just go sit in the corner, suck my thumb and watch the fun continue....:)
By the way - Brandie - I'm thinking we need an existence test first on the maturity thing.
If EXISTS(SELECT MemberID from SSC_poster where MaturityLevel>0) then
....
If that yields any results THEN build the maturity test....
Let me know how that pans out.........:D
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on my part...unless you're my manager...or a director and above...or a really loud-spoken end-user..All right - what was my emergency again?
March 19, 2008 at 11:51 am
Of course, first thing you have to do is define maturity.
😉
March 19, 2008 at 11:52 am
HEEEEHEEEEHEEEHEEE. ROTFLOL!
MAAAAAAATTTTTT!!!!
I'm supposed to be working on serious ETL stuff today! You're not allowed to make me laugh so hard that my boss glares at me from across the room!!!!!
@=)
March 19, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Brandie Tarvin (3/19/2008)
HEEEEHEEEEHEEEHEEE. ROTFLOL!MAAAAAAATTTTTT!!!!
I'm supposed to be working on serious ETL stuff today! You're not allowed to make me laugh so hard that my boss glares at me from across the room!!!!!
@=)
laughter is the best medicine. And by laughing like this , your boss is going to wonder what is so funny about DBA work or sites related to SQL. He might join this site.:-) More membership:D
-Roy
March 19, 2008 at 1:38 pm
Oooo. Ostrich and Emu's. I left those off my list. There's an ostrich/emu farm near where I live and our city just held the 20th Annual Ostrich Festival. There were even Ostrich races and yes, they did have people RIDING them.
Things I learned:
An ostrich egg is half the size of a football, an emu egg is half that, and one emu egg is the equivelant of 15 regular eggs. Both ostrich and emu taste good, but I haven't tried an egg yet.
-SQLBill
April 17, 2008 at 2:18 am
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
I came back here today and was amazed to find 31 pages of responses! I could never imagine that my post would be so popular!
Here's an update on my situation:
I was offered a contract involving SQL Server performance tuning and automating something in Rational Visual Test. I got the job because the manager was out of the country and I met with a very humble H-1 Indian guy with somewhat limited English who asked me questions such as "so have you worked with X?". I said "yes I have" and here's what I did... (making things up). He looked very impressed and I suspect he did not understand some of what I was saying but I sounded very confident!
I also talked to an HR lady who seemed to like my positive attitude. These two provided feedback via email to the manager who was in Germany at the time and she said ok. The first week I was just hanging out, taking long walks and enjoying the weather. The second week, the manager came back and that's when all the problems started. She is very nasty, never smiles, uses Hilter-like tactics to get people to work (not just myself but everyone). I could write a novel on the stuff that went on there but the less I think about it, the better I sleep 🙂
Anyway, I was out of there after 3 weeks...
Don't want to talk about it =( But I really want to talk about how to successfully pass the job interviews. I am continuously updating a document with SQL Server questions and I now also have a section of "discussion topics" which looks like this: "When they ask about X, talk about A, B and C".
Any further interview tactics would be greatly appreciated. It's very simple: I gotta either find a job or leave the country! Thanks!
April 17, 2008 at 6:14 am
So what you're really looking for is a document that will help you scam your way into a SQL Server job? Good luck with that....
Of course, there are lots of free and low-cost resources that you can use to actually learn SQL Server.
Tim Mitchell, Microsoft Data Platform MVP
Data Warehouse and ETL Consultant
TimMitchell.net | @Tim_Mitchell | Tyleris.com
ETL Best Practices
April 17, 2008 at 6:14 am
Well, I think the previous comments still stand - be honest about your skills and level; get a test system; and learn fast!
Have you come from another background - programming or another database system? If so, you should know the fundamentals about databases (tables, datatypes, purposes etc)
I found the Microsoft Press book for exam 70-431 good enough, and passing the exam perhaps should be a first step. The course for the Technology Specialist (70-431) is practical as well as theoretical, so it's a starting point if you're really determined to become a SQL Server DBA.
Just my thoughts....
April 17, 2008 at 6:22 am
You know, I'm glad there's no chance that I'll ever be involved at a company you're working at.
Tell me, what will you do if you have to demonstrate the skills that you claim to have?
Gail Shaw
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverability
April 17, 2008 at 6:25 am
I was not going to respond to this, but I can't help it. You just broadcast to the most helpful bunch of people in the world that you'll lie to get a job. Oh, and by the way, these helpful people, they're the ones that are hiring for the very job that you're trying to lie your way into... You may have burned a bridge or two and I'm heartily sorry to say it.
"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
- Theodore Roosevelt
Author of:
SQL Server Execution Plans
SQL Server Query Performance Tuning
April 17, 2008 at 6:28 am
-- Personal Opinion
By lying to get a job you have shown a lack of honesty and integrity. Not the character traits I want to see lacking in this career field (or many others for that matter). As IT professionals, we have access to critical personal and company data. If you don't have the integrity to be honest up front, how do I know I can trust you with my companies data?
You would be better served to actually take some of the advise offered here and truely learn about SQL Server.
You may also want to Google your name, Mark Markov. I think you'd be surprised. You'll actually find this thread, and if we can find it, so can employers who may do the same.
-- End Personal Opinion
😎
April 17, 2008 at 6:29 am
Grant Fritchey (3/19/2008)
Hey, I lead a pack of Cub Scouts. I'm responsible for teaching them the "Fart Song."[to the tune "The Yellow Rose of Texas"]
Oh, my body has a passage that leads up to my heart...
:w00t:
Sounds like a very important song for young cub scouts to learn. I'd be interested in the full lyrics to this tune if you would be willing to share 🙂
The Redneck DBA
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