I am responding late to a T-SQL Tuesday invite from John Sterrett. John’s call is about various ways to grow young data community/speakers.
I’m going to take a brief detour to talk about what held us together as a community over the past two decades.
We worked on a fantastic product – Microsoft SQL Server. It was thriving, growing in leaps and bounds. Each new release brought exciting features that sparked dialogues, blog posts and in-depth conversations. Jobs were plentiful if you had expertise in even one area of this vast product. We referred each other for job roles, building strong professional ties.
We saw each other often – at SQL Saturdays, PASS Summit, and other events. Between 2005 and 2018, I averaged about five events per year. We saw familiar faces and had plenty to talk about: the latest release, what worked and what didn’t, who’s hiring, who’s moving where. PASS had its fair share of politics, which added to the chatter. Twitter/X was our central hub – we knew who was attending events, where the after-parties were, and whose blogs to follow.
Then came COVID. Many of us shifted to working from home. PASS dissolved, giving way to smaller, independent or Azure-linked user groups. Some disappeared entirely. Event funding dropped and never really bounced back. SQL Server matured – still solid, but with fewer shiny new features. Twitter/X changed hands and tone, becoming more political, pushing many, even long-time influencers, away.
Meanwhile, job descriptions changed. SQL Server expertise wasn’t enough. Employers now ask for Postgres, Python, CI/CD, and more.
My late friend Brian Moran used to say that as we age, our “outer circle” gets bigger, while our “inner circle” – those we truly trust – shrinks. I found this painfully true during COVID. Pre-COVID, I had a long list of people to catch up with at events. Post-COVID, I realized many were just contacts. I don’t come from a culture that views friendship as transactional. That, combined with the discovery that many people didn’t care as much as I thought they did, left me in a difficult place.
Why didn’t they care? Partly because the West tends to treat relationships transactionally. And partly because the reasons for our interactions – events, jobs, shared tools – weren’t there anymore.
So what’s next? Is this the end of what we call “community”? I hope not.
In these tougher years, I’ve made new friends among younger speakers. I’ve learned how to support them – and be supported in return. Here are a few things that helped me:
- Actively seek out and befriend new faces. Podcasts like Finding Data Friends by Ben Weissman and Jess Pomfret are great starting points. LinkedIn is another good space. Remember – tech today is much broader than SQL Server. I follow blogs on diversity, mental health, analytics, AI, and more.
- Attend at least one event per year. If that’s not feasible, join a local user group. If that’s still tough, try a virtual event. I’m lucky to still attend PASS Summit and local meetups when I can.
- Show genuine interest in people. COVID taught me that conversations based solely on tech or politics are fleeting. Regardless of cultural norms, people crave authentic connection. Ask how someone is doing – and mean it.
What’s positive about today’s community?
- There’s far more diversity now.
- Conversations feel smoother – even without shared tech or politics.
- The younger generation is self-aware, clear on what works for them, and eager to extract value from their contributions.
Lots to learn, even for an old geek like me.
So, to answer John’s question about how to grow community: find what already exists, and participate – however you can. Real growth comes from real human connection.
Thank you, John, for hosting.