Actually the wife (who is an employee) told me not to talk to him because he's "busy". He does much of the work at home and orders the equipment through his business (he consults so he's self-employed). He's paid to do the work because they know him through the wife. He doesn't know databases at all. He installed the software by clicking "next" and accepting the defaults. She knows the Windows operating system through her work with networking them and I think she's going to be fine with taking on the system administration role to grow her career. She just needs to get over herself and give me the rights I need to do my job as DBA and web administrator. She "hates programming" so she wants me to do that. Unfortunately she wants to carve out too much of the DBA role (transactional replication! Get real.) for herself but says she doesn't want to be a DBA. She is junior to me in rank and in the first 3 years of her IT career but, because the executives are not technical they do not know what to do about this situation. Because she already has all the access and power things stay that way until I convince them otherwise.
Because I've been setting up everything on my own laptop (?!) to show them .Net interfaces to SQL Server,SSRS, etc. to demonstrate what I'll move to the server when I have the proper privileges, I have leverage. They love the prototypes and I have been telling them I will move it all to server so they aren't connecting to my laptop to look at reports and enter data,etc. They know that if I take the laptop home they don't have access to the stuff until I VPN in. They still get a glazed look on their faces when I say that I've set everything up on my laptop as if if were a server but that it's slower, non-robust, etc.
But things have been trending my way with various personnel developments so maybe all will be ok soon.
Thanks for your support and counsel.