My contribution to the body of data:
Dell Inspiron 9400 laptop
Intel Core2 T5600 CPU
4GB RAM
Windows 7 Enterprise SP1 64-bit
Microsoft SQL Server 2008 R2 (SP1) - 10.50.2500.0 (X64)
Jun 17 2011 00:54:03
Copyright (c) Microsoft Corporation
Developer Edition (64-bit) on Windows NT 6.1 <X64> (Build 7601: Service Pack 1)
Query results:
5138
3.33982
CURRENT_TIMESTAMP seems to work in 2008 R2:
SELECT CURRENT_TIMESTAMP
-----------------------
2012-02-04 09:06:08.757
SELECT CURRENT_DATE
Incorrect syntax near the keyword 'CURRENT_DATE'.