Because of more exposure to Japanese culture here in the West, the concept of the Japanese “salaryman” is better known. If you’re not familiar with that concept, it’s the company man where the first (and seemingly only) priority is to the company. Need to work unpaid overtime to get something done? Why is that even a question? Of course you are, even if it that means you haven’t had a day off and rarely a day below 12 hours in the last two years. That’s how I watched my Japanese mom tackle jobs and how I grew up thinking that was normal.
But as I’ve matured over the years, I came to realize that I needed to ask a critical question, “Who am I doing this for?” When I agree to work crazy hours, am I doing it for me, my family, or the organization? And once I determine who I’m doing it for, the next question is, “Is the sacrifice worth it?” Sacrifice means giving up something of value for something of greater value. Is my sacrifice going in the correct direction? That’s why I recommend watching the following clip from comedian Henry Cho:
He speaks openly about turning down opportunities in Hollywood because it doesn’t work for his family. The work/opportunity may sound great, but for Henry, it isn’t. There are naturally individuals who can’t understand his thinking.
What’s important to take away is that any commitment could be the same as he talks about Hollywood. It could be your primary job. It could be somewhere you’re volunteering. It could be a different organization or activity. For instance, while I’m a big proponent of Toastmasters, a few years ago I stepped away from active involvement. My company’s club shut down and while there were and are plenty of clubs I could have joined around my city, I had to ask myself if I was willing to give up that time.
Our time is a finite resource. Once a block of time is spent, that block is gone. We don’t get a redo of that block. If we want to try something again, that costs us another block of time. So as you think about the priorities and opportunities before you, make sure to ask who you’re doing it for. Toastmasters was for me. I wanted more time for my family. So though I love Toastmasters, it wasn’t a hard logical decision to allocate the time for family.