Blog Post

The Night Before Upgrade

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santacomputer

I originally wrote this in December 2011. It’s been one of my most popular posts, so reposting it has become a Christmas tradition. Enjoy!

‘Twas the night before upgrade of the serving device

Not an admin was sleeping, the men nor their mice

The cables were strung to the appropriate racks

While arrays of drives hummed, seeking their tracks

The users were nestled all snug in their beds,

Blind to the pressure on the poor admins’ heads

A rep from the vendor, dressed to impress

In case of a problem, he’d ease the distress

From the server room there arose such a clatter,

We all sprang from our chairs to see what was the matter

First one to the door, was there in a flash

I swiped my key card, expecting a crash

Lights, rows and rows, continued to blink

Assuring me that we a good link

Proceeding, across the room I ran

The sound it seemed was an exploding fan

Without a good fan the temperature would rise

Repair would be needed, and to my surprise

The rep was in action

Calling for help his immediate reaction

More rapid than eagles his supporters they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

“Now, Sheldon! now, Leonard! now, Howard and Raj!

Hurry, bring in those parts from the garage!

To the back of the rack, over there by the wall

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!”

True experts they were, their hands they did fly

Removing the cover on the very first try

In a matter of seconds, the fan was all new

The techs were so proud, and the rep was too

And then, in a twinkling, I heard a low beep

A text from my boss, asking “How deep?”

I quickly responded “Don’t worry, we’re good”

As the rep proclaimed from where he stood

“It’s time, we should get started”

As his helpers departed

A flurry of buttons he proceeded to click

An obvious pro, this guy was quick

His eyes — how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the goatee on his chin was as white as the snow;

A dribble of Red Bull ran down his chin,

I had no doubt this guy liked to win

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A squint of his eyes and a twist of his head,

Gave reason to think there was something to dread;

He spoke not a word, but continued to work,

Then suddenly logged off and turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, from the chair he rose;

Grabbing his jacket, he cried “That’s it, we’re done!

I love doing upgrades, they’re so much fun!”

Then I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

“I’ll send you a bill, but not tonight!”

christmas_wreath

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