SQL Clone
SQLServerCentral is supported by Redgate
 
Log in  ::  Register  ::  Not logged in
 
 
 


Soft Skills


Soft Skills

Author
Message
umailedit
umailedit
SSC-Addicted
SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)SSC-Addicted (469 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 469 Visits: 246
I think that the best 'soft' skills teacher is the book 'How to win friends and influence people' by Dale Carnegie. This book should be read once a year. Also for speaking, there are Dale Carnegie courses and books for public speaking.
brendan.o'connor
brendan.o'connor
Grasshopper
Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)Grasshopper (12 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 12 Visits: 178
as I mentioned it's more to do with peoples opinion of what soft skills are and the lack of confidence in organizations that causes people to be angered by the truth.
Captain Miserable
Captain Miserable
Mr or Mrs. 500
Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)Mr or Mrs. 500 (502 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 502 Visits: 191
I wouldn't say I actively seek out training resources for soft skills, but I've been fortunate enough to take a couple of courses where I work. When soft skills such as business writing (emails and communication focus), negotiations (Read 'Getting to Yes' - a very good resource), or other customer service related courses are offered, I will sign up.

It's been a few years since my last soft-skills class, but the information has stayed with me, and continues to shape my communications both with coworkers, managers, and internal customers.

Coming out of college, you tend to think you know everything, and that IT professionals should behave like "Nick Burns, Your Company's Computer Guy" - Jimmy Fallon on SNL. After a few nasty email battles and failed attempts to get results from other software vendors, my manager recommended these soft skills classes, as they became available. The whole world has opened up for me since then, and I have found soft skills to be every bit as important as the IT training that I've received over the years.
Grant Fritchey
Grant Fritchey
SSC-Dedicated
SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)SSC-Dedicated (39K reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 39810 Visits: 32645
Soft skills... Soft skills....

OH! I know. That's when you use wrist locks and grapple into submission holds rather than smash their face flat and kick their naughty bits up between their ears... Yeah, I've got those. No problem.

Jeff, they made me take ALL the weapons home. How do you rate a bat?

But on a (slightly) more serious note, it is hard for some of us to polish our soft skills. I can make two suggestions. Talk to a manager/mentor/leader that you like and respect and find out how he/she does it. I found one book really interesting on this topic just this year. It's called Becoming A Technical Leader by Gerald Weinberg. Worth a read.

Now, back to more important topics... Would a jo... uh, I mean, walking stick, yeah, a walking stick, be OK?

----------------------------------------------------
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood...
Theodore Roosevelt

The Scary DBA
Author of: SQL Server Query Performance Tuning and SQL Server Execution Plans
Product Evangelist for Red Gate Software
Shaun McGuile
Shaun McGuile
SSChasing Mays
SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)SSChasing Mays (647 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 647 Visits: 1060
Sock with a roll of quaters - cos people are scared of change BigGrin

Hiding under a desk from SSIS Implemenation Work Crazy
Anonymouse
Anonymouse
Say Hey Kid
Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)Say Hey Kid (711 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 711 Visits: 955
umailedit (7/18/2008)
I think that the best 'soft' skills teacher is the book 'How to win friends and influence people' by Dale Carnegie. This book should be read once a year. Also for speaking, there are Dale Carnegie courses and books for public speaking.


Thank you - this is the best book I've ever read. Like you said, I try to re-read it every so often. The first time I read it, I went into work and experimented with some of what Carnegie said. He's right - people think you are the best conversationalist when you never say a word!!!
tsaftalov
tsaftalov
Grasshopper
Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)Grasshopper (17 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 17 Visits: 43
I was appalled and infuriated when my manager suggested that I should improve my communication skills. He sent me to a community college course called "Mastering you people skills". After taking this course and doing some research, I learned about the term "emotional intelligence" and realized that I don't have any. Bought a book "Communications for the dummies",of course, and some tapes. Took emotional intelligence 101 (online of course) offered by our "mother" company.
After getting thru the basics started to observe and summarize the behavior patterns of my fellow software developers. Talked to some HR people and realized - we are different!!!!! They cannot me like me and I cannot be like them. However, we all need to get along and, especially, learn how to handle the conflicts. I wish I learned about it long time ago. Live and learn. I am woman, 50+ by the way, if you are wondering, and I am a queen of nerds.
Jack Corbett
  Jack Corbett
SSCoach
SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)SSCoach (18K reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 18474 Visits: 14896
I would say that I do a combination of learning through training and experience with an emphasis on experience. People who know me would find this hard to believe, but I have been offered a couple of jobs because I came across as having good people skills when I interviewed. It has also helped me that I my education was in teaching and I have had opportunities through church involvement to speak in front of people. The main thing for me has been being able to take constructive criticism from my wife. She has very good soft skills and I have picked up little things like instead of saying "I know the right way to do it", you would say, "I know a better way". It doesn't seem like much, but it does work.



Jack Corbett

Applications Developer

Don't let the good be the enemy of the best. -- Paul Fleming
At best you can say that one job may be more secure than another, but total job security is an illusion. -- Rod at work

Check out these links on how to get faster and more accurate answers:
Forum Etiquette: How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help
Need an Answer? Actually, No ... You Need a Question
How to Post Performance Problems
Crosstabs and Pivots or How to turn rows into columns Part 1
Crosstabs and Pivots or How to turn rows into columns Part 2
mcorrea
mcorrea
Grasshopper
Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)Grasshopper (13 reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 13 Visits: 686
Discussions about the 'truth' tend to get sensitive especially if one practices the use of truths in one's daily work. These discussions can also get heated when different personalities and egos get in the way.

The key is whether or not we choose to use tact.

Here's a simple lesson in sociology and communication I learned many years ago. Suppose you were asked to describe the appearance of a particular stranger. Using tact, you could describe this person as having, "a look that makes time stand still."

Conversely, the description of the same person, sans tact, would go like this - "Your face can stop a clock!"

Any questions? Smile
Adam Angelini
Adam Angelini
SSCommitted
SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)SSCommitted (1.6K reputation)

Group: General Forum Members
Points: 1552 Visits: 1177
Thanks for all the feedback so far. There have been some great suggestions, as well as some humorous ones. I appreciate all of them.
Go


Permissions

You can't post new topics.
You can't post topic replies.
You can't post new polls.
You can't post replies to polls.
You can't edit your own topics.
You can't delete your own topics.
You can't edit other topics.
You can't delete other topics.
You can't edit your own posts.
You can't edit other posts.
You can't delete your own posts.
You can't delete other posts.
You can't post events.
You can't edit your own events.
You can't edit other events.
You can't delete your own events.
You can't delete other events.
You can't send private messages.
You can't send emails.
You can read topics.
You can't vote in polls.
You can't upload attachments.
You can download attachments.
You can't post HTML code.
You can't edit HTML code.
You can't post IFCode.
You can't post JavaScript.
You can post emoticons.
You can't post or upload images.

Select a forum

































































































































































SQLServerCentral


Search