I was appalled and infuriated when my manager suggested that I should improve my communication skills. He sent me to a community college course called "Mastering you people skills". After taking this course and doing some research, I learned about the term "emotional intelligence" and realized that I don't have any. Bought a book "Communications for the dummies",of course, and some tapes. Took emotional intelligence 101 (online of course) offered by our "mother" company.

After getting thru the basics started to observe and summarize the behavior patterns of my fellow software developers. Talked to some HR people and realized - we are different!!!!! They cannot me like me and I cannot be like them. However, we all need to get along and, especially, learn how to handle the conflicts. I wish I learned about it long time ago. Live and learn. I am woman, 50+ by the way, if you are wondering, and I am a queen of nerds.