It is obviously physically impossible to process many if not most 'natural keys' as efficiently as surrogate ones, therefore your pining about this 'evil' is to no avail. At least you ACKNOWLEDGE the need for surrogate keys - something Celko in his ivory tower still doesn't do. Espousing a 23 character key when a tinyint will suffice as a surrogate is simply ridiculous.
Best,
Kevin G. Boles
SQL Server Consultant
SQL MVP 2007-2012
TheSQLGuru on googles mail service