Perhaps you could try this.
1) Send all of your potential updates to a staging table.
2) Do a Merge from the staging table to perform the update using a source something like
(Select * from staging)
Except
(Select relevant cols from target join staging on col = col)
The except condition should remove the identical rows without fuss.
If you haven't even tried to resolve your issue, please don't expect the hard-working volunteers here to waste their time providing links to answers which you could easily have found yourself.