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Trusting Online Expand / Collapse
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Posted Wednesday, June 24, 2009 6:42 AM


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Comments posted to this topic are about the item Trusting Online






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Post #740984
Posted Wednesday, June 24, 2009 6:43 AM


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Since I've found that I can trust the vast majority of people, I start out by trusting and then stop doing so if it's warranted. Makes it much simpler, and works for me.

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Post #740985
Posted Wednesday, June 24, 2009 12:45 PM
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GSquared (6/24/2009)
Since I've found that I can trust the vast majority of people, I start out by trusting and then stop doing so if it's warranted. Makes it much simpler, and works for me.


Same here and I think it is easy to get trusted online because if you like to help people, they just keep coming back because you have solve their problem in the past.



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Gift Peddie
Post #741287
Posted Wednesday, June 24, 2009 11:31 PM


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I just follow my gut. Sometimes I just get feelings of trust or distrust from people...

In fact there is only one group of people that I instantly distrust, regardless of everything.... Vehicle Drivers; I have seem too much on the roads to ever trust any of them :P

-d
Post #741559
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 6:39 AM
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I agree, gut instincts almost never fail; especially as you get older.

And, I also agree you should always assume any "other" driver will take an action that puts you at risk. (And remember that you are also the "other" driver.)

I will add one of my favorite sayings: "You don't have to be a farmer to smell bullshit."

Thank you Steve for never offending my sense of smell...
Post #741756
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 9:06 AM
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I try not to start with trust or distrust - as much as possible start at neutral short of a bad vibe, because you should trust your instincts. Real trust is earned, and it's always intrigued me that while hard to earn, you can lose it in a instant with a relatively small misstep. Earning back trust after that is hard, sometimes impossible.

I'd say my main measure of a person (and of myself) is whether they do what they say they will do. That's not the same as trust, but for me it's a sizeable part of it.


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Post #741890
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 9:39 AM


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There are two old sayings that I've come to live by regarding trust...

In God we trust, everyone else needs data.

I can see that Steve supports this one based on the fact that he double checks Paul Randal's and, presumably everyone else's answers.

When trying to gain someone's trust, you have to follow Andy Warren's advice and follow through with what you say you will do which leads to my second old saying:

Let your yes be yes and your no be no.



Post #741922
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 9:52 AM
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trust (or distrust) is one of the most sophisticated of human behaviors. There is a strong instinctive basis, and we spend much of our formative years refining it. It makes human culture and cooperation possible.

A vast portion of our mental machinery is dedicated to the concept. Researchers have found that by framing a logic problem as a cheater detection people solved it much more quickly than framing the same problem in a more abstract manner.

trust is layered and relative. There are people I trust on line to varying degrees, due to experience and the risk involved. A $20 trinket purchased from a stranger on Ebay is an easy trust, buying an antique car online requires a great deal more caution.

But in the end, online trust is exactly like every other trust we develop.

1) based somewhat on experience

2) affected by degree of risk if the trust is violated

3) is dynamic and constantly subject to update.



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Post #741943
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 10:22 AM


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Your use of the word "trust" worries the heck out of me. I think you meant to say "respect" and if I reread your editorial and replace every "trust" with "respect" it sounds much better, much more natural.

You make a rather astonishing statement; "Gaining trust online is the same as gaining trust in the real world". I think if you believe that you have really missed the short history of the web.

In the real world we deal usually in multiple contexts with people where on the web - as with your trust of Paul Randal's advice - its a single-thread context. Thats not enough for trust. Respect, yes, trust no.

Sorry to be absurd about it - but to make the point - Do you trust Paul Randal to say, manage your finances? Babysit your kids? Borrow your favorite car? You see my problem - you use the word "trust" when I think what you meant to say was that you highly respect Paul Randal's SQL advice in that narrow context. That does not then translate to "trust".

I get your editorial point - but the wording needs a rewrite. Anyone who would trust anything over the internet and not check and verify is well, an accident waiting to happen.


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Post #741975
Posted Thursday, June 25, 2009 10:28 AM


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blandry (6/25/2009)
Your use of the word "trust" worries the heck out of me. I think you meant to say "respect" and if I reread your editorial and replace every "trust" with "respect" it sounds much better, much more natural.

You make a rather astonishing statement; "Gaining trust online is the same as gaining trust in the real world". I think if you believe that you have really missed the short history of the web.

In the real world we deal usually in multiple contexts with people where on the web - as with your trust of Paul Randal's advice - its a single-thread context. Thats not enough for trust. Respect, yes, trust no.

Sorry to be absurd about it - but to make the point - Do you trust Paul Randal to say, manage your finances? Babysit your kids? Borrow your favorite car? You see my problem - you use the word "trust" when I think what you meant to say was that you highly respect Paul Randal's SQL advice in that narrow context. That does not then translate to "trust".

I get your editorial point - but the wording needs a rewrite. Anyone who would trust anything over the internet and not check and verify is well, an accident waiting to happen.


I have to disagree. I think "trust " is the correct word. You "trust" a doctor to provide you with proper medical career, but would you "trust" him with your favorite sports car, checkbook, or to rebuild your desktop PC?

Trust comes in many forms.




Lynn Pettis

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