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Are the posted questions getting worse? Expand / Collapse
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Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 9:31 AM
Grasshopper

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SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
Sean Lange (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
The Dixie Flatline (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)


This isn't a water cooler. This is a 24 hour all-you-can eat buffet with hard liquor and amphetamines.




That's funny


All great humor is grounded in pain and truth.

Country music is grounded in three chords and the truth.


To those who still enjoy classic rock, those three chords are painful.
Now I can't understand why I don't enjoy country music as much as humor.
Thanks for confusing me again.


But country music is no longer country music. It is now classic rock.


Does that mean it will be Heavy Metal in 5 years?

Or will it swing towards industrial?

They already tried rap and that was bad enough to kill a dead man.


In 5 years, guys in skinny jeans will listen to it on LP and scoff at those who "probably haven't heard of it".
Post #1597364
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 9:40 AM


SSC-Insane

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bantrim (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
Sean Lange (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
The Dixie Flatline (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)


This isn't a water cooler. This is a 24 hour all-you-can eat buffet with hard liquor and amphetamines.




That's funny


All great humor is grounded in pain and truth.

Country music is grounded in three chords and the truth.


To those who still enjoy classic rock, those three chords are painful.
Now I can't understand why I don't enjoy country music as much as humor.
Thanks for confusing me again.


But country music is no longer country music. It is now classic rock.


Does that mean it will be Heavy Metal in 5 years?

Or will it swing towards industrial?

They already tried rap and that was bad enough to kill a dead man.


In 5 years, guys in skinny jeans will listen to it on LP and scoff at those who "probably haven't heard of it".


You forgot to mention that the skinny joins were hanging down around their knees.




Jason AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
I have given a name to my pain...
MCM SQL Server


SQL RNNR

Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw
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Hidden RBAR - Jeff Moden
VLFs and the Tran Log - Kimberly Tripp
Post #1597367
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:08 AM
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SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
Sean Lange (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
The Dixie Flatline (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)


This isn't a water cooler. This is a 24 hour all-you-can eat buffet with hard liquor and amphetamines.




That's funny


All great humor is grounded in pain and truth.

Country music is grounded in three chords and the truth.


To those who still enjoy classic rock, those three chords are painful.
Now I can't understand why I don't enjoy country music as much as humor.
Thanks for confusing me again.


But country music is no longer country music. It is now classic rock.


Does that mean it will be Heavy Metal in 5 years?

Or will it swing towards industrial?

They already tried rap and that was bad enough to kill a dead man.


In 5 years, guys in skinny jeans will listen to it on LP and scoff at those who "probably haven't heard of it".


You forgot to mention that the skinny joins were hanging down around their knees.


skinny joins? Is that a new SQL Server method for limiting the size of resulting datasets?


--------------------------------------
When you encounter a problem, if the solution isn't readily evident go back to the start and check your assumptions.
--------------------------------------
It’s unpleasantly like being drunk.
What’s so unpleasant about being drunk?
You ask a glass of water. -- Douglas Adams
Post #1597384
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:22 AM


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Stefan Krzywicki (7/29/2014)
skinny joins? Is that a new SQL Server method for limiting the size of resulting datasets?


Why yes, where have you been?
Post #1597390
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:24 AM
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Stefan Krzywicki (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
Sean Lange (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
The Dixie Flatline (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)


This isn't a water cooler. This is a 24 hour all-you-can eat buffet with hard liquor and amphetamines.




That's funny


All great humor is grounded in pain and truth.

Country music is grounded in three chords and the truth.


To those who still enjoy classic rock, those three chords are painful.
Now I can't understand why I don't enjoy country music as much as humor.
Thanks for confusing me again.


But country music is no longer country music. It is now classic rock.


Does that mean it will be Heavy Metal in 5 years?

Or will it swing towards industrial?

They already tried rap and that was bad enough to kill a dead man.


In 5 years, guys in skinny jeans will listen to it on LP and scoff at those who "probably haven't heard of it".


You forgot to mention that the skinny joins were hanging down around their knees.


skinny joins? Is that a new SQL Server method for limiting the size of resulting datasets?

You better ask Mr. C (Lynn's buddy) but I think the proper syntax is LOWER JOIN
Post #1597392
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:27 AM
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ChrisM@Work (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)
Ed Wagner (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
Winter and Road Construction.
In Minnesota, there is a pothole season too.
Plenty of time here too, although I'd venture to say someone taking in the whole Thread might take a bit more time than just the posts here.
It is easy to get sidetracked into other threads which spawned some of these cooler comments.
Or into calculating the velocity of the famed European Swallow, or terminal velocity of some of Jeff's weapons cache.

I can see a day when PASS has a Thread Jeopardy Contest.
Quote and who said it first, or fill in the missing word.

Yeah, we have the same season in Michigan. As for the European Swallow, you know it's a question of weight ratios when you consider the weight of a coconut. Jeff's pork chops are highly variant, depending on model. Finally, this is what some of us consider a water cooler, no matter that's being served.


I think you need to use the quotes when you refer to it like that then.

Hey guys, want to go down to the "water cooler"?


I'd hate to misquote someone. It could lead to technical discussion.
Which is bad etiquette on the Thread.
It might be better to leave the hint, so the reader can search google for the source and draw their own conclusions.
This will give them a more rounded background into context around the subject.
Kind of like Interview Questions - do they know just the answer to the question, or can they express why this is the answer.


Mosquito someone? Is that biting them and giving them malaria?


No, it's the other way around, that's squashing them
Post #1597393
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:31 AM


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Eirikur Eiriksson (7/29/2014)
Stefan Krzywicki (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
Sean Lange (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
The Dixie Flatline (7/29/2014)
SQLRNNR (7/29/2014)
bantrim (7/29/2014)


This isn't a water cooler. This is a 24 hour all-you-can eat buffet with hard liquor and amphetamines.




That's funny


All great humor is grounded in pain and truth.

Country music is grounded in three chords and the truth.


To those who still enjoy classic rock, those three chords are painful.
Now I can't understand why I don't enjoy country music as much as humor.
Thanks for confusing me again.


But country music is no longer country music. It is now classic rock.


Does that mean it will be Heavy Metal in 5 years?

Or will it swing towards industrial?

They already tried rap and that was bad enough to kill a dead man.


In 5 years, guys in skinny jeans will listen to it on LP and scoff at those who "probably haven't heard of it".


You forgot to mention that the skinny joins were hanging down around their knees.


skinny joins? Is that a new SQL Server method for limiting the size of resulting datasets?

You better ask Mr. C (Lynn's buddy) but I think the proper syntax is LOWER JOIN


My brain obviously has an auto-correct for anything that resembles joins.

That was unintentional - wow.




Jason AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
I have given a name to my pain...
MCM SQL Server


SQL RNNR

Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw
Posting Data Etiquette - Jeff Moden
Hidden RBAR - Jeff Moden
VLFs and the Tran Log - Kimberly Tripp
Post #1597395
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:32 AM
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The Dixie Flatline (7/28/2014)
Now THIS is a Terminator...



Would that be 2000 p/ps (pork ribs per second)
Post #1597396
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:45 AM
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Group: General Forum Members
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Ed Wagner (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
Winter and Road Construction.
In Minnesota, there is a pothole season too.
Plenty of time here too, although I'd venture to say someone taking in the whole Thread might take a bit more time than just the posts here.
It is easy to get sidetracked into other threads which spawned some of these cooler comments.
Or into calculating the velocity of the famed European Swallow, or terminal velocity of some of Jeff's weapons cache.

I can see a day when PASS has a Thread Jeopardy Contest.
Quote and who said it first, or fill in the missing word.

Yeah, we have the same season in Michigan. As for the European Swallow, you know it's a question of weight ratios when you consider the weight of a coconut. Jeff's pork chops are highly variant, depending on model. Finally, this is what some of us consider a water cooler, no matter that's being served.


A classic Fluid dynamics problem, can you post a proper DDL? Simple things like Coconut Spin Rate, Spin direction to Trajectory Angle, Pork Chop Glazing, Pork Chop Exit Angle (not the ones landing on the moon though). We need some more information to be able to help you out here................\o/...........
Post #1597404
Posted Tuesday, July 29, 2014 11:31 AM
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Eirikur Eiriksson (7/29/2014)
Ed Wagner (7/29/2014)
Greg Edwards-268690 (7/29/2014)
Winter and Road Construction.
In Minnesota, there is a pothole season too.
Plenty of time here too, although I'd venture to say someone taking in the whole Thread might take a bit more time than just the posts here.
It is easy to get sidetracked into other threads which spawned some of these cooler comments.
Or into calculating the velocity of the famed European Swallow, or terminal velocity of some of Jeff's weapons cache.

I can see a day when PASS has a Thread Jeopardy Contest.
Quote and who said it first, or fill in the missing word.

Yeah, we have the same season in Michigan. As for the European Swallow, you know it's a question of weight ratios when you consider the weight of a coconut. Jeff's pork chops are highly variant, depending on model. Finally, this is what some of us consider a water cooler, no matter that's being served.


A classic Fluid dynamics problem, can you post a proper DDL? Simple things like Coconut Spin Rate, Spin direction to Trajectory Angle, Pork Chop Glazing, Pork Chop Exit Angle (not the ones landing on the moon though). We need some more information to be able to help you out here................\o/...........

The coconut would be spinning when carried by a swallow, no matter if it's African or European. I don't know if the swallow would be flying near the equator or not.

Since pork chops are typically glazed in the last few minutes of cooking to prevent burning the glaze itself, the pork chops wouldn't have any glaze because they're raw when launched by one of Jeff's high-velocity launchers. Being frozen is a completely different story, so we'll need to calculate for both scenarios. The angle depends on the specific model of launcher used and whether or not it's tethered to the user's belt.

My DBCC Timewarp has malfunctioned and Koen cracked the crystal ball (after getting it from Lynn, who got it from Grant), so you'll have to take your best guess at the DDL.



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